Hot Pursuit

hot pursuit

Numbers can be deceiving. It’s an age-old adage. A movie can make more than a billion dollars at the box office and still not be worth your time. A song can go to #1 on the charts and be unlistenable. There are other, better examples that I can’t think of right now, but you know it’s true: sometimes, numbers can be deceiving.

Not always, though. Hot Pursuit, which currently owns an 8% freshness rating on Rotten Tomatoes, deserves each and every one of those 52 percentage points that keep it from being a “fresh” movie.

I wanted to like this movie. I really did. I think Reese Witherspoon is super charming, I lovelovelove Election, and her run-ins with the law make me like her even more. The only thing I’ve really ever seen Sofia Vergara in is Modern Family, which I really enjoyed until it became a caricature of itself and a running string of cliches and tropes. With two likeable leads (plus cameos from Mike Birbiglia and Jim Gaffigan), I thought this movie had the ability to slide by on charm alone.

I hadn’t heard great things about Hot Pursuit, but I gave it a go anyway. Let me tell you this: in no way is this film worth your time. Reese Witherspoon is already a southern belle, but she affects this grating southern accent (on top of her own accent?) that makes every line she says hurt. Sofia Vergara plays a dumber version of her character on Modern Family, but is essentially the same role you’ve always seen her as.

The duo’s wacky road trip and misadventures aren’t fun or funny. I don’t want to bash this movie too hard, because it’s not offensively bad. But it teeters close to that line, and is seriously missing the level of charm to devote even 87 minutes (including credits!) to.